Recovery should be for yourself.
Yes, people will benefit from you getting better. Your kids may live better lives, your mum may not spend her days worrying about you and your best friend will get to remember the friend you used to be.
But you need to recover for yourself.
Not for your family, not for your friends. Not for your partner and not for your colleagues. Not for the customer you served today and not for the people you pass in the street. Not for the author of the article that pushed you towards recovery or for your favourite singer or band. Not for the therapist who is aiding your recovery.
Recover for yourself. Recover for the 7 year old you who always dreamed of growing up a famous singer or dancer or footballer. Recover for the you who worked hard to get all the grades they needed to eventually get their dream degree or job. Recover for the you who smashed all the interviews they went to for work. Recover for the you in 10 years time, who will look back on this and be happy they survived.
Recover so you can wake up happy and are excited to start the day. Recover so you can do the basic things you could once do easily. Recover so you can sleep at night and actually want to wake up the next morning. Recover so you can take that step closer to loving yourself and loving life.
Recover so you can breathe again. Recover so you can see your future in a positive way, instead of quietly hoping that your future doesn't exist. Recover for your health and well being. Recover so you can help other people get better too.
Recover so you don't have to lie to yourself every morning when getting ready for the day. Recover so you can feel comfortable in your clothes and in your skin. Recover so you don't feel the need to cover up all the time to hide things and recover so you accept the person you are. Recover so you don't feel guilty every time you say you're okay, when inside you feel like crumbling.
It won't be easy.
You won't just wake up tomorrow a completely better person, whether this be in relation to eating disorders, anxiety, depression or addiction. You won't suddenly be a happier, healthier person. You don't have "transformed" overnight from one simple choice. The voices won't just stop. No recovery from any mental health problem will be easy.
You'll have to fight with yourself alot. You'll have to rely on others to help you through situations that a recovered you will soon be able to do yourself. You'll have bad days. You'll have them alot. You'll continuously have mood swings and really low moments. But this time you'll fight it off. You'll eat the apple, you'll get out of bed. You'll refrain from hurting yourself and you'll refrain from breaking down. You'll do it, be proud of yourself for staying strong. The next day, you'll have the same arguments with yourself, and you'll fight it off again.
You'll relapse. You'll think you're back to where you're started from, when reality you're further towards recovery than you ever were before.
But soon, it'll get easier. Bad days get far and few between. You'll find it easier to beat the bad days, you'll find it easier to block the negative you out.
We are comfortable with familiarity, so the idea of relapsing back into your old self is tempting, but once you become familiar with a happier, healthier you, then it'll be so much easier to be the person you want to be.
Continue to fight when it seems pointless and continue to fight when you don't feel like fighting anymore. Continue to battle when you feel like you've lost the war and when people are telling you it isn't worth it.
Recover.
There is nothing better than getting better. You need to get better.
Recover for yourself, open a new chapter and no matter how much you fall just keep getting back up again.
I promise you, it will all be worth it.
Recover so you don't have to lie to yourself every morning when getting ready for the day. Recover so you can feel comfortable in your clothes and in your skin. Recover so you don't feel the need to cover up all the time to hide things and recover so you accept the person you are. Recover so you don't feel guilty every time you say you're okay, when inside you feel like crumbling.
It won't be easy.
You won't just wake up tomorrow a completely better person, whether this be in relation to eating disorders, anxiety, depression or addiction. You won't suddenly be a happier, healthier person. You don't have "transformed" overnight from one simple choice. The voices won't just stop. No recovery from any mental health problem will be easy.
You'll have to fight with yourself alot. You'll have to rely on others to help you through situations that a recovered you will soon be able to do yourself. You'll have bad days. You'll have them alot. You'll continuously have mood swings and really low moments. But this time you'll fight it off. You'll eat the apple, you'll get out of bed. You'll refrain from hurting yourself and you'll refrain from breaking down. You'll do it, be proud of yourself for staying strong. The next day, you'll have the same arguments with yourself, and you'll fight it off again.
You'll relapse. You'll think you're back to where you're started from, when reality you're further towards recovery than you ever were before.
But soon, it'll get easier. Bad days get far and few between. You'll find it easier to beat the bad days, you'll find it easier to block the negative you out.
We are comfortable with familiarity, so the idea of relapsing back into your old self is tempting, but once you become familiar with a happier, healthier you, then it'll be so much easier to be the person you want to be.
Continue to fight when it seems pointless and continue to fight when you don't feel like fighting anymore. Continue to battle when you feel like you've lost the war and when people are telling you it isn't worth it.
Recover.
There is nothing better than getting better. You need to get better.
Recover for yourself, open a new chapter and no matter how much you fall just keep getting back up again.
I promise you, it will all be worth it.
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