PS, alot of this is rather negative towards parts of the show, if you're even going to bother to publically be shitty about this then just stop reading now. These are MY opinions from the perspective of a person who has previously been in a very similar place to Hannah, so the whole "i bet they don't even understand mental health" shit doesn't apply if you don't agree, bye.
PPS, links at the bottom if you are ever in need of help in regards to mental health / suicide.*
As many of you may know, 13 Reasons Why is a novel released by author Jay Asher, which has now been made into a 13 part series on Netflix. (Before I properly start, I love Asher as an author and human being, cool)
It tells the story of Hannah Baker (Played by Katherine Langford) and ultimately why she decided to commit suicide. The focus of the story is based around 13 recorded tapes, that explain why she made this decision. These tapes are passed around her classmates who made up the reasons. But this story is "told" as Clay Jensen has the tapes, a person unlike everyone else in the story. It is represented on Netflix through 13 episodes, one for each tape, each episode an hour or so long. It is also rather addictive.
13 Reasons Why (TRW) was a book I read and loved as a child. But when I was reading it all those years ago, I didn't have an understanding like I do now about mental health. The book was published when I was 11. I read it aged 12. At this point in my life, I didn't know what mental health, self harm and suicide even really was. I didn't think it to be a "thing" that people actually did. But now, I know different. And with mental health being a topic I am highly passionate about, when I heard about the series I was highly expectant of it's portrayal of a topic dear to my heart. Also on that point, reading it so young meant i didn't really remember what happened. So I was excited to refresh my memory.
And even though I did enjoy the series, I have mixed reviews of it. Yes, it got me completely hooked and led to a binge watch (when I should've been studying for my degree but whatevs first year doesn't count right?), but there are parts of the portrayal I loved and parts I just didn't agree with.
So here it goes.
First things first, I want to talk about my absolute favourite part of the series, which is probably not really spoken about enough if I'm honest. Hannah's parents.
The thing about wanting to die, is the belief that everyone would be happier without you being alive. For many people, you think you are more of a burden to people than any form of worth, and that you'd be making people's lives better if you were gone. You might also think that no one would miss you or even realise you weren't alive.
And that is what I love about the series. The acting of Hannah's parent's is absolutely commendable. Yes, it is obvious that other characters too are feeling the same anger and grief, however it is mainly seen through her parents constant emotional display that completely pulled on my heart strings. It's one thing being told that the effects of suicide are real and bigger than you will realise, but to see how her parents and friends lives were shattered and affected by her suicide I personally believe is such a needed portrayal in society, and really fucking hit home. You often convince yourself that no one cares about you, but this just showed that people do. People do care about you, and it really makes you think again about putting these people through such horrible emotions and horrible times. I don't think I could ever understand what parents in that situation must be going through, but the show portrays it in a way that tries to tell the story.
Another thing I actually liked was the layout of the series. I liked that it was one episode per tape. I loved how Clay paused the tapes and then everything around him carried on. I loved how it wasn't solely focused on Hannah all the time. It flowed so well and at this point I give a shout out to Clay Jensen (played by Dylan Minnette) for not rushing through the tapes, and telling the story so fucking well. I loved how past Clay/Hannah and present Clay matched up together at certain points (like the scene at the car crash or the basketball match). It brought the story to life in a way that words alone couldn't do. It was wonderful and so well done. My only issue was the whole one hour episodes thing, because it dragged the story on certain peoples tapes on way longer than it needed to, but I guess that's more binge watching time.
Right. Now lets go onto my negatives.
Lets start with Clay. Ah Clay, a cute little innocent guy, who just loved Hannah Baker. This point isn't actually about Clay himself. I loved Clay, I thought he was great. He was real and awesome and you could tell how much this was affecting him and I was so damn worried about his mental state for so long, I was convinced he was in the ambulance (if you're reading and didn't want spoilers, I warned you). He says my favourite line in the show, "Everyone is just so nice until they drive you to kill yourself". He wants to make everything known to the world like it should've been, especially with Bryce. I admired Clay as a character.
What I hated was the "I cost a girl her life because I was afraid to love her" line. Now let me stop you there. No matter what any of the characters or people in this world thing, LOVE DOES NOT SAVE EVERYTHING. Why is the message that love conquers all even linked to this. I personally feel like it tries to hint at the whole, if someone finds love they won't want to commit suicide idea, which just isn't true. Yeah, love is wonderful, but it doesn't fix your thoughts. It doesn't make your mental health suddenly any better than it was when you weren't in love. People in love still commit suicide, because feelings of suicide is a complex, horrible thing that doesn't have one easy solution. Neither does mental health.
This kinda brings me onto my next point. Mental health in the show isn't mentioned directly and it should have. No, you don't need to have a mental health difficulty to have suicidal feelings. That's not what I'm saying. But many characters have obvious signs of some sort of problem/addiction, that I personally felt should have been addressed. Alex showed signs of being suicidal (yes i believe he shot himself in the head, fuck this whole it was Tyler shit), Justin was abused at home, that was kinda brushed off. Hannah was probably suffering from some form of PTSD (Jessica may have too) and probably depression. I also think Clay has symptoms of (social) anxiety. But not one of these words were even mentioned.
A show that was so passionate about teenagers mental health and suicide prevention, I personally believe NEEDED to have said these things. A person may be sat watching thinking that they had similar symptoms to a character, realise they may have a similar or the same mental health problem, and then talk to someone about it. Because at the end of the day, that is a huge part the show should be playing. Also, there was a significant sub story surrounding their underage drinking and alcohol/drug abuse that was also brushed off and in my personal opinion, didn't even make it seem like this was a problem. And it damn well should have. Because, kinda speaking from experience, reliance on alcohol to make your problems go away is a very bad thing to do, which can easily turn into an alcohol addiction to make everything okay. Which it doesn't. I can vouch for that.
Another shorter point. Yes, TRW, thank you for having trigger warnings on the episodes with rape and with Hannah's suicide. They were so needed it's unreal. I knew from the start I couldn't dare to watch the suicide scene, so when I knew it was coming I was able to find out the timings and skip it. However, I personally think a few more were needed. The episodes with Hannah laying dead on the basketball court I think needed a TW. Ones with abuse of Justin I think did to. And a few more did. But they weren't there and I felt really shit and uncomfortable and mentally not okay for a while after watching certain scenes, all because of the lack of a warning. I know, a show about suicide is going to be rather triggering, but I still don't want to unexpectedly see a girl with cut open arms appearing on my screen. It isn't okay.
My final and probably biggest thing about the series was Hannah's portrayal. At a writing level. I think Katherine did a wonderful job as Hannah. But at a character level, honestly, parts made her seem like a whiny little bitch. Yeah, I said it. Obviously I'm not saying she was, because I said at the start, I know what it's like. I know how much words can slice you down, how every little thing bundles up to a point you just cannot do it anymore. But, she was portrayed at many times as an attention seeker, a liar ("why would a dead girl lie?". By the end, some characters understand (kinda) that she wasn't attention seeking, but once again, this wasn't properly addressed. It adds the fuel to the fire about suicide being selfish, and that is not okay.
My main issue though for this point, was actually the tape system. This isn't something I actually active hated until I spoke to a friend after finishing. Look, I know it's kinda the whole plot of the book and series. It's a nice creative idea yes, but not realistic enough. Not that it had to be, it just was portrayed too realistically (dw, I know what I mean), for me to be able to look past it and be like, yeah okay I can roll with it. Also, I hate, hate hate hate how she didn't leave her parents a note. It's bad enough that her parents have to go through this, let alone do it without closure from Hannah. THEY deserved closure and some answers. Personally, I don't believe the people who hurt her deserved it, if her own parents weren't getting it. And the whole "everyone hears everyone elses tapes" doesn't fly by me either, because that makes it into a game of pass the blame, which also shouldn't have happened. Why? Because the only person who I personally believe was to blame was BRYCE FUCKING WALKER, who didn't even hear the tapes. Oh, and suicide isn't a game of "who did it". You hear me?
All of this, makes Hannah seem abit bratty. Who would put her friends/old friends through the pain they went through? Why on earth was Clay/Alex and even Jessica etc put on the same fucking set of tapes as Bryce. Surely she knew that it would push them over the edge. Because it made me feel awful, and I wasn't even involved (obviously). You wouldn't put the people you love through that, you just wouldn't.
And I'm not saying that what happened to Hannah was in any way okay. I said earlier, I know how much words and actions hurt. How badly pictures can ruin your life. And I cannot imagine how awful witnessing a rape and being raped must have been. I would never wish that on anyone, I have so much respect for all rape survivors I cannot even put it into words. But I cannot convince myself that anyone could realistically record these stories onto the tapes and get the people that "hurt her" to listen, because truth be told, they're probably all emotional messes as it is.
Hannah could and should have been portrayed abit better in my opinion, that's all I'm saying. Because, Hannah Baker, "You're good and kind and decent. And I didn't deserve to be with someone like you. I never would. It would have ruined you. It wasn't you. It was me" and "Why didn't you say that to me when I was alive" are two quotes that I wish you had never said. Because it makes me really angry, that you didn't want to ruin Clay, but then proceeding to put him on these tapes (surely you knew it would have ruined him). And you cannot say he "killed you" for leaving a room after you told him to fuck off a good 3 or 4 times. Come on, please.
And that's where I'll end off the ranting.
I'll end it there for a few reasons, but mainly because, despite all the problems I had with the show, I still think it needs to be watched. Not because "it shows people that words really hurt" because if you didn't already know that then you are a complete ignorant asshole, but because I really think the aftermath of a suicide needs to be shown. It just needs to be. People need to visually see that suicide leads to horrible consequences, whether that be guilt if you played a significant part or grief because you lost a love one. Because seeing (especially the latter) this portrayed can honestly hit people in a way that words simply cannot, and here I speak from experience.
Yes, it has flaws. But those are my personal opinions. People have different perspectives, I get that. Some people think it did a wonderful job of expressing it's points, I personally think it could have done better. Mental health and suicide are topics that, even though the stigma now is breaking down for, are just not talked about enough. This show opens the topic to people that may not have understood it beforehand, it gives a message that I have not seen often enough in the media and that is something I respect. I respect the fact the show spoke to psychologists and even people who had experienced this kind of thing, to make it as realistic as possible. Justin Prentice (who plays Bryce) even says how devastating the script was to him, but how he felt he had to play it as best he could so viewers saw the message and understand that it's okay to talk about this. On the whole, the etiquette of everyone involved was wonderful and I am SO thankful that they went through this process.
And even though I felt abit let down by the series, I am so thankful it exists. I hope it sends around the message that suicide is never the answer and that it is okay to talk about this kind of thing.
PS, massive shoutout to Tony. I loved Tony, he also looks like Bruno Mars. He is genuine, a good stalker (shade to Tyler) and a fantastic friend. The coming out to Clay scene was my favourite bit of all 13ish hours. It was wonderful 100/10.
// If you ever feel suicidal and are in urgent need of help, this website contains a list of suicide hotlines for all the countries in the world, no matter where you are, help is avaliable. http://www.suicide.org/international-suicide-hotlines.html
For more information about mental illness and suicide, visit www.mind.org.uk or www.childline.org.uk.
Do not be afraid to talk about it. It'll all be okay. //
Another thing I actually liked was the layout of the series. I liked that it was one episode per tape. I loved how Clay paused the tapes and then everything around him carried on. I loved how it wasn't solely focused on Hannah all the time. It flowed so well and at this point I give a shout out to Clay Jensen (played by Dylan Minnette) for not rushing through the tapes, and telling the story so fucking well. I loved how past Clay/Hannah and present Clay matched up together at certain points (like the scene at the car crash or the basketball match). It brought the story to life in a way that words alone couldn't do. It was wonderful and so well done. My only issue was the whole one hour episodes thing, because it dragged the story on certain peoples tapes on way longer than it needed to, but I guess that's more binge watching time.
Right. Now lets go onto my negatives.
Lets start with Clay. Ah Clay, a cute little innocent guy, who just loved Hannah Baker. This point isn't actually about Clay himself. I loved Clay, I thought he was great. He was real and awesome and you could tell how much this was affecting him and I was so damn worried about his mental state for so long, I was convinced he was in the ambulance (if you're reading and didn't want spoilers, I warned you). He says my favourite line in the show, "Everyone is just so nice until they drive you to kill yourself". He wants to make everything known to the world like it should've been, especially with Bryce. I admired Clay as a character.
What I hated was the "I cost a girl her life because I was afraid to love her" line. Now let me stop you there. No matter what any of the characters or people in this world thing, LOVE DOES NOT SAVE EVERYTHING. Why is the message that love conquers all even linked to this. I personally feel like it tries to hint at the whole, if someone finds love they won't want to commit suicide idea, which just isn't true. Yeah, love is wonderful, but it doesn't fix your thoughts. It doesn't make your mental health suddenly any better than it was when you weren't in love. People in love still commit suicide, because feelings of suicide is a complex, horrible thing that doesn't have one easy solution. Neither does mental health.
This kinda brings me onto my next point. Mental health in the show isn't mentioned directly and it should have. No, you don't need to have a mental health difficulty to have suicidal feelings. That's not what I'm saying. But many characters have obvious signs of some sort of problem/addiction, that I personally felt should have been addressed. Alex showed signs of being suicidal (yes i believe he shot himself in the head, fuck this whole it was Tyler shit), Justin was abused at home, that was kinda brushed off. Hannah was probably suffering from some form of PTSD (Jessica may have too) and probably depression. I also think Clay has symptoms of (social) anxiety. But not one of these words were even mentioned.
A show that was so passionate about teenagers mental health and suicide prevention, I personally believe NEEDED to have said these things. A person may be sat watching thinking that they had similar symptoms to a character, realise they may have a similar or the same mental health problem, and then talk to someone about it. Because at the end of the day, that is a huge part the show should be playing. Also, there was a significant sub story surrounding their underage drinking and alcohol/drug abuse that was also brushed off and in my personal opinion, didn't even make it seem like this was a problem. And it damn well should have. Because, kinda speaking from experience, reliance on alcohol to make your problems go away is a very bad thing to do, which can easily turn into an alcohol addiction to make everything okay. Which it doesn't. I can vouch for that.
Another shorter point. Yes, TRW, thank you for having trigger warnings on the episodes with rape and with Hannah's suicide. They were so needed it's unreal. I knew from the start I couldn't dare to watch the suicide scene, so when I knew it was coming I was able to find out the timings and skip it. However, I personally think a few more were needed. The episodes with Hannah laying dead on the basketball court I think needed a TW. Ones with abuse of Justin I think did to. And a few more did. But they weren't there and I felt really shit and uncomfortable and mentally not okay for a while after watching certain scenes, all because of the lack of a warning. I know, a show about suicide is going to be rather triggering, but I still don't want to unexpectedly see a girl with cut open arms appearing on my screen. It isn't okay.
My final and probably biggest thing about the series was Hannah's portrayal. At a writing level. I think Katherine did a wonderful job as Hannah. But at a character level, honestly, parts made her seem like a whiny little bitch. Yeah, I said it. Obviously I'm not saying she was, because I said at the start, I know what it's like. I know how much words can slice you down, how every little thing bundles up to a point you just cannot do it anymore. But, she was portrayed at many times as an attention seeker, a liar ("why would a dead girl lie?". By the end, some characters understand (kinda) that she wasn't attention seeking, but once again, this wasn't properly addressed. It adds the fuel to the fire about suicide being selfish, and that is not okay.
My main issue though for this point, was actually the tape system. This isn't something I actually active hated until I spoke to a friend after finishing. Look, I know it's kinda the whole plot of the book and series. It's a nice creative idea yes, but not realistic enough. Not that it had to be, it just was portrayed too realistically (dw, I know what I mean), for me to be able to look past it and be like, yeah okay I can roll with it. Also, I hate, hate hate hate how she didn't leave her parents a note. It's bad enough that her parents have to go through this, let alone do it without closure from Hannah. THEY deserved closure and some answers. Personally, I don't believe the people who hurt her deserved it, if her own parents weren't getting it. And the whole "everyone hears everyone elses tapes" doesn't fly by me either, because that makes it into a game of pass the blame, which also shouldn't have happened. Why? Because the only person who I personally believe was to blame was BRYCE FUCKING WALKER, who didn't even hear the tapes. Oh, and suicide isn't a game of "who did it". You hear me?
All of this, makes Hannah seem abit bratty. Who would put her friends/old friends through the pain they went through? Why on earth was Clay/Alex and even Jessica etc put on the same fucking set of tapes as Bryce. Surely she knew that it would push them over the edge. Because it made me feel awful, and I wasn't even involved (obviously). You wouldn't put the people you love through that, you just wouldn't.
And I'm not saying that what happened to Hannah was in any way okay. I said earlier, I know how much words and actions hurt. How badly pictures can ruin your life. And I cannot imagine how awful witnessing a rape and being raped must have been. I would never wish that on anyone, I have so much respect for all rape survivors I cannot even put it into words. But I cannot convince myself that anyone could realistically record these stories onto the tapes and get the people that "hurt her" to listen, because truth be told, they're probably all emotional messes as it is.
Hannah could and should have been portrayed abit better in my opinion, that's all I'm saying. Because, Hannah Baker, "You're good and kind and decent. And I didn't deserve to be with someone like you. I never would. It would have ruined you. It wasn't you. It was me" and "Why didn't you say that to me when I was alive" are two quotes that I wish you had never said. Because it makes me really angry, that you didn't want to ruin Clay, but then proceeding to put him on these tapes (surely you knew it would have ruined him). And you cannot say he "killed you" for leaving a room after you told him to fuck off a good 3 or 4 times. Come on, please.
And that's where I'll end off the ranting.
I'll end it there for a few reasons, but mainly because, despite all the problems I had with the show, I still think it needs to be watched. Not because "it shows people that words really hurt" because if you didn't already know that then you are a complete ignorant asshole, but because I really think the aftermath of a suicide needs to be shown. It just needs to be. People need to visually see that suicide leads to horrible consequences, whether that be guilt if you played a significant part or grief because you lost a love one. Because seeing (especially the latter) this portrayed can honestly hit people in a way that words simply cannot, and here I speak from experience.
Yes, it has flaws. But those are my personal opinions. People have different perspectives, I get that. Some people think it did a wonderful job of expressing it's points, I personally think it could have done better. Mental health and suicide are topics that, even though the stigma now is breaking down for, are just not talked about enough. This show opens the topic to people that may not have understood it beforehand, it gives a message that I have not seen often enough in the media and that is something I respect. I respect the fact the show spoke to psychologists and even people who had experienced this kind of thing, to make it as realistic as possible. Justin Prentice (who plays Bryce) even says how devastating the script was to him, but how he felt he had to play it as best he could so viewers saw the message and understand that it's okay to talk about this. On the whole, the etiquette of everyone involved was wonderful and I am SO thankful that they went through this process.
And even though I felt abit let down by the series, I am so thankful it exists. I hope it sends around the message that suicide is never the answer and that it is okay to talk about this kind of thing.
PS, massive shoutout to Tony. I loved Tony, he also looks like Bruno Mars. He is genuine, a good stalker (shade to Tyler) and a fantastic friend. The coming out to Clay scene was my favourite bit of all 13ish hours. It was wonderful 100/10.
// If you ever feel suicidal and are in urgent need of help, this website contains a list of suicide hotlines for all the countries in the world, no matter where you are, help is avaliable. http://www.suicide.org/international-suicide-hotlines.html
For more information about mental illness and suicide, visit www.mind.org.uk or www.childline.org.uk.
Do not be afraid to talk about it. It'll all be okay. //
